Stop press

The adage 'a fool and his money are soon parted' is often applicable to me, as readers of one of my other blogs would readily testify. This time, I think my investment was worth it, despite my growing antipathy towards dating websites.

As an ex-member of Match.com, twice weekly I receive an email from the website featuring women who meet my requirements. As they send me 12 profiles a week, most of them are entirely unsuitable. In fact, I probably click on only one in 10 to read more.

But on Christmas Eve, the email I received featured a profile that caught my attention. On investigation, I was blown away (metaphorically, not literally). The woman ticked pretty much every box: short hair, curvy, 5ft 4ins, subtle tattoo, sporty, university educated and well travelled. She was even a freelance journalist! Talk about Christmas coming early.

There was no option but to stump up £30 for a month's membership. Taking onboard advice that, although witty, my emails can sometimes be construed as sarcastic, I sent her a friendly email without a single word to which she could have taken offence. That was three weeks ago. Like Diana Ross, I'm still waiting....

To cap it all, I've just heard a woman on 'Celebrity' Big Brother bereft of any personality just say that the longest period for which she has been single is two weeks.